i wish we'd known...

6 years ago today. or was it really only yesterday?

some days i don't know. some days i can't tell.

i only know that you're gone and that i ache for you.

we all ache for you.

i cannot seem to get beyond how you must have felt.

what your last moments on this earth walk must have been.

oh jordin, how i wish we'd have recognized your pain.

i would have gladly taken it from you, if i'd known.

i wish i could have helped you see that it would get better.

please forgive us all.

you are sorely missed and very loved.

save your mama a seat, son.

i'll see you in a little while

happy birthday, son

dear jordin,

i have a responsibility to those i love

to be loving, patient, considerate and kind

to be loyal, respectful and honest

to be appreciative, encouraging and comforting

to share myself and care for myself

to be the best possible "me"

BUT

i am not responsible for them

not for their achievements, successes or triumphs

not for their joy, gratification or fullfillment

not for their defeats, failures or disappointments

and NOT for their suicide

for had i been responsible

your death would not have occurred.

~author unknown

another birthday...without you.

who was it that said it got easier with time?

they lied.

the jordin sized hole in my heart stays the same.

still raw around the edges,

still aching with the loss of you

save your mama a seat, son

i'll be there in just a little while

i'll love you, forever and a day

mom

Thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.

I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too.

I think of you in silence, I often speak your name.

All I have are memories and a picture in a frame.

Your memory is a keepsake, with which I'll never part.

God has you in His keeping, I have you in my heart♥ .