Friday, October 2, 2009

happy birthday jordin



here we are, observing your 3oth birthday without you.
are you watching son? do you see us eating your birthday dinner?
do you feel us missing you? loving you?

can you hear the sound of your mama's heart breaking, again?

when does it get easier jordin? when does the hurting stop?
i miss you so very very much and days like this, when we should
be able to hug you and wish you happiness only reminds us of
our loss.

i simply don't have any more words right now except i love you.
i love you and i miss you and i'd give anything to see you smile today.

save your mama a seat, son. i'll be there in just a little while!

from friends who haven't forgotten:

Dear Jayedee,

I am thinking of you today and of your precious child, Jordin.
My son's birthday recently passed also. I know how very difficult it is.
I really, really tried to think of happy memories of
my Daniel,
which I was able to do, but bittersweet memories they are
and they still bring tears. I hope that you are able to spend the day the way
that you want to and that it is as gentle on you as possible.
I am sending you sisterly love and hugs!

Suzanne
Mama of Daniel...

A beautiful human being
8/23/84 - 1/3/08


Jayedee,
Today, as you remember your sweet Jordin on his birthday,
know I am here in Pa. holding you so very close to my heart.
May only happy memories find you today.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( Jaydee ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Mindi -Michael's mom, 7/24/77-5/23/01

Dear Jayedee,

My wish for you is that you will have a day filled with many memories
of happier times with your precious Jordin.

Take care and peaceful thoughts.

Shirley
Ma to Katie and Adam ( a survivor also)
5/15/75 - 9/10/03

Dear Jayedee & family,

We know you are on no POS mail but we are sending POSitive thoughts and
holding you in our hearts on the Birth Date of Jordin.
May the happier memories help to ease the pain and may the day pass
as peaceful as it can. A candle is lit here in England for Jordin
and all the POS children. Take care.

(((((((((((((((Jayedee & family ---- Jordin's Mom & family)))))))))))))))

With love and in friendship,
Bob (Moderator) and Lynda of Watford, England
Parents of Darren, 15th December 1978-31st August 1998
Died by hanging whilst he was on holiday in France

May our children's spirits continue to fly, on....on, into the great blue yonder
"Loved today, yesterday and forever more"
"Forever In Our Hearts"


Jayedee
Please try remember that tomarrow was a special birthday.
1979 was the year you gave birth to a wonderful special baby boy
You loved him with all your heart and you will always love him
and even though JORDIN can not be with you physically JORDIN is
still with you emotionally and spiritually.
Try to remember the day of his birth and his 1st Birthday and
all the ones you did have with him. Remember HE still loves YOU too.
Please be gentle to yourself today, tomorrow and always

Debra ~ mother of Shawn Preston Rego
who died at age 15 by passive hanging two months before his 16 B-day
May 29, 1990 - March 22, 2006 Forever 15


((((((Jayedee))))))

I'm still here, holding you close in my heart on your precious Jordin's Birth Date today.
I hope that you have a peaceful day full of beautiful memories of cherished birthdays,
together with your sweet son and may you be able to celebrate the wonderful 25 years
of life that your dear Jordin was with you. Take care Jaydee, today and always.

Love and Friendship, Debbie, Mom of Alicia Ann, Manitoba, Canada
^i^ALICIA ANN LAWLESS~September 25, 1984 - September 29, 2002~
18 Years 4 Days
Forever Young^i^


Friday, August 21, 2009

august 21, 2009

thank you, joe, for this song. i never knew you even listened to madonna!



Keep, keep it together
Keep people together forever and ever

I got brothers, I got some sisters too
Stuck in the middle tell you what I'm gonna do
Gonna get out of here, I'm gonna leave this place
So I can forget every single hungry face
I'm tired of sharing all the hand me downs
To get attention I must always be the clown
I wanna be different, I wanna be on my own
But Daddy said listen, you will always have a home

Chorus:

Keep it together in the family
They're a reminder of your history
Brothers and sisters they hold the key
To your heart and your soul
Don't forget that your family is gold

I hit the big time but I still get the blues
Everyone's a stranger, city life can get to you
People can be so cold, never want to turn your back
Just givin' to get something
Always wanting something back
When I get lonely and I need to be
Loved for who I am, not what they want to see
Brothers and sisters, they've always been there for me
We have a connection, home is where the heart should be

(chorus)

Intermediate:

When I look back on all the misery
And all the heartache that they brought to me
I wouldn't change it for another chance
'Cause blood is thicker than any other circumstance

When I get lonely and I need to be
Loved for who I am, not what they want to see
Brothers and sisters, they've always been there for me
We have a connection, home is where the heart should be

(intermediate)
(chorus)

Keep, keep it together
Keep people together forever and ever
(repeat and fade)

Thursday, August 20, 2009

august 20, 2009

i'm trying, baby, i'm trying. they're SO resistant to change!


i love you, forever and a day,
mom

Friday, April 24, 2009

april 24, 2009

dear jordin,

i was just thinking, this morning, how i would put a drop of blue
food coloring in your sippy cup and a drop of red in brianna's so
i could tell the difference from across the room. isn't it funny where
your mind takes you sometimes?

save me a seat!

love,
mom

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

april 22, 2009

dear jordin,

did you think your mama had dropped off the edge of the earth?

i don't know how, but somehow i'm still here,
still kicking and much to some other family members' chagrin,
hanging in there pretty darn well.

i thought i saw you walking down hwy 46 the other day joe.
something about this fellow's height, his walk or his way of carrying
himself reminded me so much of you. you must be on my mind more
than i think because when i'm out doing my afternoon/evening
chores, i find myself listening for you too.

it makes me so sad, joe, that there is this huge jordin sized hole
in our lives now. i admit to some days being relieved that i'm not
waiting for the next phone call telling us you're in jail again, or in
some kind of personal crisis. but i'd take all the anguish back again
just to see your face or hear your laugh.

we've had no word from aly about your son, again.
this time for over a year. once in a while someone will see her dad
around town, but he is never forthcoming with her phone number
and only promises to relay the message that we miss her and
would love to see justin again.

dad and james have had a new pond dug in the front pasture.
it's huge....much bigger than i originally thought it would be.
i think i'll claim a little corner of the bank and make myself a little
meditation spot where i can go and ponder things.
you would love it.......
i can see you swinging out across it on a rope swing,
whooping and hollering before you hit the water!
my silly silly boy!

i love you jordin, save me a seat.....i'll be there in a little while.

mom

Friday, January 2, 2009

Legacy.com Guest Book
in partnership with
Jordin Erik DeWitt
Tuesday, December 02, 2008

dear jordin,

it's been 4 years now, since you decided to leave us.
in some ways it feels like yesterday, in others a million
years ago, and in still others, another lifetime entirely.

with the passing of each year, i feel like we leave you
further and further behind. it breaks my heart.

i've run the gamut of emotions, joe. i've gone from
mind numbing grief, to anger and back again, numerous times.
each time the grief becomes bearable, something happens to
remind me of you, and i plunge into the abyss again.

my life has become a litany of would have, should have, could haves
and i feel helpless to fight against it. i hate feeling helpless, jordin.
you know i do. but helpless i am.

i know that i know, that my faith keeps me able to tread the water
that has become my life. it's unimaginable to me how those without
faith can cope. with no faith, there is no hope and with no hope, what
is there?

the holidays are here again. what i'd like to do is get into bed and
pull the covers over my head and not come out again until the new year,
but in each year since your death, God has engineered it so i have little
ones in the house. little ones that do not understand that gramma is
having a sad day. so i bake and decorate and wrap presents and wish
for things that i cannot have. at the end of the day, i close myself in the
bathroom and cry until the tears won't come anymore. the next
day, it all begins again.

that's my life now jordin. now there are questions that
can never be answered and pain that will never end. not just for me...
for your twin, your son, your other siblings and their families. we are
all stuck, to some extent, in 2004. we cannot move forward.

we're losing connection with you.
you're gone.
we've lost you,
we've lost justin.
today,tomorrow and all the tomorrows after that,
that's the way it rolls.

today, i'm angry, son, but that doesn't change the fact that i miss
you every single day and i love you more than life. so you save
me a seat, and i'll see you in a little while.

love,
mama
who is one day closer to hugging you again

—jordin's mom, geneva, Florida
Thursday, October 02, 2008

It's our birthday once again,and still you are not here.There are so many things I am feeling,anger,hurt,lost,love,heartbroken.Our birthday will never be the same.There is so much I want to say,but I don't know where to begin,so I will end it with I love you and miss you more than words can say.

Bri

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Thursday, October 02, 2008

happy birthday jordin!
fall is in the air and i find myself listening for you whooping it up down the road at night. i'm remembering countless bonfires and roasted marshmallows, all the tales we told and how you always kept us in stitches with your stories and antics.
i miss those days, son, more than i have words for. i miss you and even though i know the passing of each day brings us closer to seeing you again, the wait is hard.
i'm holding you close today, joe. can you feel it?
and as we eat your birthday lasagne tonight, please know that you are loved beyond words and sorely missed by all of us.

i love you!
mom
(who is one day closer to holding you again)

—jayedee, geneva, Florida
Tuesday, May 27, 2008

dear jordin,
this morning, for whatever reason, i awoke to the scab being torn from the wound that your death caused. the nerve endings are screaming and i am missing you so very very much. i am playing "with hope" over and over to remind myself that i WILL see you again, but dadgum it joe, i want it now! i miss you now! i want a hug NOW!
i need a visit, hon. please?

1 Thess. 4:13-14 / Heb. 6:9, 10:23

This is not at all how
We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you
We had so many dreams
And now you've gone away
And left us with the memories of your smile
And nothing we can say
And nothing we can do
Can take away the pain
The pain of losing you, but ...

We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, oh no
And we can grieve with hope
'Cause we believe with hope
(There's a place by God's grace)
There's a place where we'll see your face again
We'll see your face again

And never have I known
Anything so hard to understand
And never have I questioned more
The wisdom of God's plan
But through the cloud of tears
I see the Father's smile and say well done
And I imagine you
Where you wanted most to be
Seeing all your dreams come true
'Cause now you're home
And now you're free, and ...

We have this hope as an anchor
'Cause we believe that everything
God promised us is true, so ...

We wait with hope
And we ache with hope
We hold on with hope
We let go with hope

—mom, geneva, Florida
Sunday, December 02, 2007

I miss you.

—DJ, Geneva, Florida
Sunday, December 02, 2007

i woke up this morning thinking i'd heard you shouting, "attention all geneva citizens! this is your daily wake up call! daily! daily! E-V-E-R-Y day means daily! but as i lay there, reality filtered thru and i realized you weren't here....again.

oh jordin, it's been three long years since you left us and there is still such a big hole in the fabric of our family that none of us has been able to figure out how to patch.

it's true that the tears fall less frequently, but the ache lingers on.

i miss your humor son. no one ever made me laugh the way you do (and over things i knew i shouldn't laugh about!) i miss you raggin on my about "health foods" i miss your compassion, i miss your hugs. i miss a thousand things that make you jordin and sometimes the wait to see you again is still nearly unbearable.

but, wait, i will, and sometimes i'll dream of what it will be on that day that heavenly Father allows us to all be together again.

until then, joe, remember that i love you, take care of my dog and don't forget to save me a seat.

i love you baby, for forever and a day!

—mama, geneva, Florida
Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Happy Birthday.It's still hard with you not being here with me.It's OUR birthday and you are not here with us.I miss you more than words could ever say,but you know that.There isn't not one day that goes by that I don't think of you.Not one.You are not only my brother,but my best friend.I love you.

—Bri, Geneva, Florida
Tuesday, October 02, 2007

happy birthday darlin! how strange it feels to wish you happy birthday when you're not here with us. i don't think that's something i'll ever get used to.
i miss you so much, but then you already know that from our talk last night. i'll be watching today to see what you come up with for me.
brianna, dave and the kids are coming for dinner tonight. your sister needs a jordin hug today, son, she's missing you terribly, especially today on the birthday you share.
and your mama needs a favor too...please watch for sugar. she truly has a foot in both worlds right now and is hours away from crossing the bridge, i think she'll prolly wait for your birthday to be over, but then she'll be right along. i keep telling her that you're right there waiting for her and that it's ok to go. so you watch out for my dog hon, and take care of her till i get there.
i carry you close, jordin, in my heart and thoughts.
save me a seat baby, i'll be there in a little while!
i love you

—mom, geneva, Florida
Monday, September 10, 2007

oh jordin! i'm feeling raw with missing you today

i love you baby, forever and a day

—mom, geneva, Florida
Sunday, September 09, 2007

I found some old pictures of us a few days ago and thought of how simple everything seemed then. Happiness was easy without the reality of life's tragedies. I miss U always! I live right down the street from "the swamp" little bro cheap Gator tickets U would have loved it. I wish things were different. I wish I could have helped u see. I'll love u forever!! xoxo Connie

—Connie, Gainesville, Florida
Friday, August 17, 2007

aly's right, son, your little boy is completely amazing and we love spending time with him. i can see so much of you in him--the way he smiles, his zest for life, his off the wall sense of humor! he is my joy and my heart!

i love you, baby and miss you more with each passing day.

save me a seat, i'll be there in a little while.

—mom, geneva, Florida
Wednesday, August 15, 2007

hey joe...so many days have passed where i try and forget what happened. but you are so memorable and such an irreplaceable person that i cannot. your son is 4 now and is such a smart boy, he is beautiful. i just hope you are watching down on him and smiling. we love and miss you so much and i wish i was there for you when you needed me most...jordin you are (were) such an amazing person and i am glad you will live on through justin. we miss and love you...sorry it took me so long joe, i love you so much

—allison (aly) coarse, orlando, Florida
Monday, January 01, 2007

oh jordin....another new year has begun. another year without you in our lives. midnight was bittersweet. we toasted each other with gingerale and were so grateful to be together, but each one of us had thoughts of you and wished you were with us to raise a glass and make silly resolutions that we all know we won't keep.
afterwards, as i lay in bed, i kept expecting to hear your woo hoo hooooo drifting thru the night, but last night, like so many others, i was disappointed. i miss you so much, joe. i want to see your smile and touch your sweet face. i want to hear you say "hey mama" like you always did and give me a great big bear hug.
please be ok son. and please find a way, if you can, to let us know.

i love you joe
forever and a day!

—mom who is one day closer to hugging you again, geneva
Sunday, December 03, 2006

i went to a concert last night so i would have something else to focus on. it worked pretty well until half way through when i realized how much i wanted you to be standing there beside me. i miss you and i love you so much!

—patty, orlando, Florida
Saturday, December 02, 2006

bri and i went to the cemetary today.
so many people had been there before us. they left momentos and tokens of their love for you! i wish you had realized how very loved you were! how very loved you still are!

i love you baby,
forever and a day.

mom-who is one day closer to hugging you again

—mom, geneva, Florida
Saturday, December 02, 2006

two years, joe.....it's been two long years since you left us. i don't know how we've gotten thru them or how we will continue to get thru until we see you again!
everywhere i go, i expect to see your face or hear your voice. everytime i see a young man with your build, or walk, or haircut, my heart skips a beat in anticipation that it might be you.
missing you comes in waves....i have days now, that feel almost normal and then i'm blindsided by the memory that you're gone. mornings are the hardest.....waking up to a world that you're not in is not something i ever expected to have to do.
i miss you so, baby. save me a seat, i'll be there in a little while.
i'll love you forever
mom
who is one day closer to hugging you again

—mom, geneva, Florida
Saturday, December 02, 2006

Another year has gone by without you.Not a day goes by I don't think of you and miss you.We got a gift to hear your voice and see your face yesterday.I miss so much.There are not enough words to express how I feel right now,just know that I love and miss you so very much.
Bri

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Wednesday, October 11, 2006

joe, i'm so sorry my birthday entry to you took so long to post. (it should have been there on the 2nd) i know that you know that our hearts were full of you on your birthday (as they are every day).
i love you baby!
(forever and a day)

—mom, geneva, Florida
Tuesday, October 10, 2006

happy birthday my love
the day passed quietly and gently for us all here at home. cate, bri and i visited the cemetary and i did my little "housekeeping chores"
aly called and gave us all the opportunity to speak with justin. what a conversationalist! such a little man. aly wants us to meet this week and have a first visit....please pull a few strings for us if you can!
i love you baby and we're all missing you dreadfully.
gonna go get your lasagne in the oven now.
see you soon!

—mom, geneva, Florida
Monday, October 02, 2006

Hey Jordin,
I wanted to tell you Happy Birthday!! I want you to know that a lot of people think of you often & miss you greatly. Even though you are gone you are not forgotten. Happy Birthday Again, Stacey

—Stacey Allen, Canyon Lake, Texas
Monday, June 12, 2006

Hey Jordin, Think of you & your family often. I guess we are all coping as best we can. God bless. Mary Ann (Bryan Storys mom)

—Anonymous
Sunday, May 21, 2006

Jordin, ive been missing you so much the last few days. im thankful that these times come and go and that for the most part when i think of you i am able to think of all the wonderful things that made you who you are. i cant wait til im with you again cuz i really need you to put your arms around me. i love you joe!!

—patty
Friday, February 10, 2006

I had the strangest dream last night that everything was ok again. You were here and everyone was together. It seemed so real even though none of it made any sense. Just a crazy dream. I love you Jordin.

—Connie
Sunday, January 08, 2006

Jordin, I can't believe that you are gone. It is still just such a shock to me. I always expected you to pop back up around here. I just want you to know that I still care about you and have love for you. Hopefully you and Tyler have found each other, give him a big hug and kiss for me. I am trying to find pictures of you for your family but I had know idea how difficult it would be to look at you and not cry. I guess it is still all too new to me still. Jordin, just know that you are missed greatly not only by your family in Florida but your family in Texas also. You had an impact on alot of people here. Until next time.

Love,

—Stacey Allen, Canyon Lake, Texas
Friday, January 06, 2006

I wanted to express my deepest sympathy to Jordins family and to let you guys know that Zach and I just found out and are dumbfounded by the whole incident. I would like to hear from Ali if you could get the message to her my number is 830-237-4342 and again my deepest sympathy and my thoughts and prayers are with you. Jordin was loved very much and will be missed even more. God be with you all.

—Jody Crocker, Canyon Lake, Texas
Monday, January 02, 2006

Jordin, I can't believe your gone. We just found out. I guess I always expected you to pop back up here and surprise us, like you use to. We all have so many memories of you here, but it sounds like you have many people who miss you everywhere. You touched so many peoples lives. You made me laugh, you make me smile. Everytime I was in a bad mood, you knew how to cheer me up. Remember when you let me learn how to drive a standard in your car? You said there wasn't anything more I could do to mess it up. Then I brought it back on fire! And all you did was laugh! I'm only sad that we didn't know what was going on - maybe we could've helped you. I know your in a better place now. I hope your up there with Tyler and all of your other family and friends. Please watch over us and be there for us when it's our time to go. We love you Jordin and we miss you so much!

—Theresa Keltner, Canyon Lake, Texas
Saturday, December 03, 2005

Hey bro, you know this really sucks. I know that you are better now, but what do we do? We have to keep living, missing you, until the day that we can be together again. It's just not fair little brother. We are supposed to look back on life together and laugh about all the crazy things we've been through. And you're not with me. A year has past and I miss you more each day. I will always love you Joe.

—Connie
Thursday, December 01, 2005

How can it be a year already? A whole year has passed since you left us Jordin.

I still play our game, you know the one where'd we'd try to beat the other at guessing old songs, and my boys, they remind me daily of you, how'd you manage that? One of them looks like you and the other acts like you did when you were little.

Dammit Jordin, just dammit.

One day we gotta have a talk my brother. But maybe then it won't be as important, I will simply understand. Cuz tonight I sure don't.

I do love you.

—Lib, Florida
Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I love you Joe!

—Lib, Florida
Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Happy Birthday.Our first Birthday and the start of many without you.It's our special day.And you are not here with me.It's not right.We are supposed to be together on our b-day.I miss you and think of you everyday.There aren't words to desricbe how I feel so I'll just say I love you more then you'll know.Your twin,
Bri

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Sunday, October 02, 2005

i want you back!
i want to shout halleluiah for another birthday
that brings you closer to the best of who you were to become
a beautiful man child full of grace and truth

they tell me that beyond the blue is what we call Home
what our soul secretly longs for even in life
i'm jealous of that place that holds you
just out of my reach not a curtain or a veil but a fortress strong

it's your first birthday in Heaven
i wonder what its like to soar with no gravity to hold you
to be free of sorrow and a burden
that defines our existence here in this imperfect space

even so, i will mark this time
this red letter day when you came to me
and filled me with such awe and responsibility
the best of all and worst of all

i love you Jordin,
forever and a day

—mom, who is one day closer to hugging you again
Friday, September 16, 2005

You at Christmas time and Bo on mom's birthday. Did you guys think we would ever forget you?? Silly Boys! Never.......
Hey Joe,
We moved to Osteen, 7 acres. You'd like it, lotsa room to run and hide LOL and the only difficult fence to maneuver is into the gator pond - but then even you wouldn't jump in there during a quick getaway, would you?
I don't pretend I think you are anything more than sleeping right now. If that isn't the case please give Muzzy a big hug for me and tell Bo I am sorry I didn't know him. Don't hurt yourself if you decide to take up motorcycles. Maybe you and Bo can start up a group in Heaven. Gives a new meaning to Hells Angels huh?
I do love you, you know!

—Lib, Florida
Thursday, September 15, 2005

oh joe! please can't you and bo get together and send a little comfort to aunt barb? its all so new for her and her pain is so raw and horrible. i so wish she could have just a glimpse of our two boys and that we could have just a little understanding of why both our boys were called home so close to one another.
justin did you proud, son, when we went to say goodbye to bo. such a little man in his shirt and tie. thank you for him, joe, he's such a joy to us.
i am missing you dreadfully today, baby and even though i know that each day brings us closer, its a hard path to walk.
remind bo to save a few seats, k?
i love you,
forever and a day,
mom

—mom, geneva
Thursday, September 15, 2005

There aren't enough words to tell you how I feel.I miss you so much.I talk to you all the time.Do you hear me?I wish I had done things diffently.Maybe you still be here with me,with all of us.Do you know about Bo?We lost him on Mom's b-day.Is he there with you now?Do you guys know how much you are missed?And loved?I love you
Bri

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Hey Bro, I had a dream this morning that we were together just hanging around like we used to. It seemed so real, like I had just awoke up from some long slumber and you were there with me. It was nice to feel so close to you even if only for those short moments in my mind. I really wish you were. I miss you everyday. I am so sorry Jordin.

—Connie, Orlando
Thursday, May 05, 2005

it's scott and nick's 18th birthday joe. can you see what awesome men they're growing into? are you rejoicing with us? somehow, i know you are.
i feel your presence so strongly in geneva, joe. every corner i turn, i still look for you ambling down the road.......i suppose i always will.
justin is growing a changing a little every day. i know you're proud of your boy, son. i see so much of you in him!

i love you baby,
forever and a day!

—mom
Sunday, May 01, 2005

i miss you joe.......so much
i'll love you forever.....and a day

—mom, Florida
Saturday, April 09, 2005

I still linger in disbelief. I thought that by now I would be past that but I just cant believe youre really gone. I wish I would have said so much. There are so many things I wish I would have done differently. I would have done anything just to have you here with me. My worlds not as bright as it was when you were here to share it with me. I hope one day you know how sorry I am that I didnt do more for you. I cant wait to see you again Joe! I love you so much!

—patty
Saturday, March 19, 2005

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

—Corinne Buchanan, Chicopee, Massachusetts
Tuesday, March 08, 2005

It was getting dark at the grave where a faithful mother prays;
While in a sunlit realm just a breath away,
We could hear her beloved son have these words to say.
"Look Lord! It is mom again. She loves me so."
"Yes, my little one, "He said, "How well I know."
"Lord," he sighed, "I love this place you
Prepared for me.
Such beauty, such joy, it set my feet to dance ...
but...if only mom could have a glance.
You see, she worries about me
and if I'm happy where I am.
Would you send a sign to let her know
I am in your promised land?
It is darker now and mom can barely see.
Dear Lord, would you reassure her please?
From his pleading eyes and pixie grin, He knew
he sought a miracle from Him.
"I will," He smiled...and touching the child's golden hair;
He spun a dazzling sunbeam to shine on mom
down there.

i love you, joe, forever and a day

—mom
Tuesday, February 15, 2005


DEATH

So many people imagine that death cruelly separates us from our loved ones. When our loved ones die, they do not leave us, they remain. They do not go to some dark and distant place. They simply begin their eternity. We do not see them because we are still in the darkness of this world. But their spiritual eyes, filled with the light of heaven are always watching us as they wait for the day when we will share their perfect joy.
We are born for heaven and one by one we end this life of tears to begin our life in happiness. I have often reflected upon this beautiful truth and found it the greatest and surest comfort in time of mourning. A firm faith in the real and continual presence of our loved ones has brought the conviction and consolation that death has not destroyed them, nor carried them away. Rather it has given them life! A life with power to know fully and to love perfectly. With this new life and new power our loved ones are always present to us, knowing us and loving us more then ever before. The tears that dampen our eyes in times of mourning are tears of homesickness, tears of longing for our loved ones. But it is we who are away from home, not they. Death has been for them a doorway to an eternal home. And only because this heavenly home is invisible to our worldly eyes, we cannot see them so near us. Yet, they are with us, lovingly and tenderly waiting for the day when we, too,
will enter the doorway of our eternal home. No, death is not a separation really: It is a preparation for eternal union with those we love, in the peace and joy of heaven.........Bob Graham

i love you, joe.....
forever and a day...

—mom
Sunday, February 13, 2005

it's speed week joe....i cannot imagine the nascar season without you. i am missing you terribly, and thoughts of you consume my day.....so many unanswered questions, so many things left unsaid.
i love you baby!
forever and a day

—mom, geneva
Monday, February 07, 2005

I think of you alot.I know you were in pain but I can't but wonder why we were not enough for you to to stay.Are you looking on us to see how much you are loved and missed?I pray for the day I can see you again.It will be to long til that day.I love you Jordin,I hope you know that. Bri

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Sunday, February 06, 2005

It Wasn't My Intention~

Another day for you to wonder,
another day for you to mourn.

It wasn't my intention to go before the coming dawn
My pain was deep within my heart and troubled head.

It wasn't my intention to go without words said.

My frame of mind seemed normal, or so I heard them say
It wasn't my intention not to see another day.

I did not mean to make you suffer or cause you so much pain.
It wasn't my intention to never see you again.

Despair and confusion left my aching mind unsure
It wasn't my intention to suddenly close life's door.

If only I could give you reasons and brush the tears away
It wasn't my intention to leave you and not stay.

I did not mean for you to grieve, now left alone to cry.
It wasn't my intention to leave you, forever asking why?

As the burdens of life's worries slowly ebb from my heart,
It wasn't my intention to tear your soul apart.
author unknown

i love you joe!
forever and a day

—mom
Thursday, February 03, 2005

Hi Jordin - Your Mom & I have been comparing our two sons. We have discovered our sons are alot alike. I hope the 2 of you meet. We know you both were crazy about Dale Earnhardt. We need the 2 of you to help us make it through this long journey we are on. Let us know you are watching over us & help us be strong. We love you guys dearly. We are living for the day we see you again & can hold our babies in our arms. In our hearts & souls you remain. Bye for now. Mary Ann

—Mary Ann Vaughan, Mayfield, Kentucky
Thursday, February 03, 2005

Thinking about you alot today Joe. I just can't help thinking that this some how isn't real. I keep going through it. I really miss you. I love you always.

—Connie, Orlando, Florida
Monday, January 31, 2005

"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice
at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow."

dear joe......this is about where i am in my walk. most days i feel like i'm not going to be able to roll out of bed.....then i take a deep breath and put my feet on the floor....and so goes it, day after day.
i love you baby
forever and a day,

—mom
Friday, January 21, 2005

Two minutes after his birth.....
I could hear his announcing scream.
I couldn't believe he was finally here,
The realization of my dream.

Two hours after his birth.....
I held him so close to my chest.
Somehow that little boy let me see,
A special love that never left.

Two days after his birth.....
I held his tiny little hand.
I told him there would be lots of things
That I would help him to understand.

Two weeks after his birth.....
He had that sparkle in his eyes,
And when he showed me that little smile,
I thought that I would surely die.

Two months after his birth.....
He was just beginning to learn.
He didn't like me to go away,
And he cried until I returned.

Two years after his birth......
I still couldn't believe he was mine.
We talked and laughed and went for walks.
We had so many special times..

Two after.....

Two minutes after his death.....
I didn't know I needed to scream.
I thought that he was still safe and here.
I didn't know the truth of my dream.

Two hours after his death.....
I felt a strangeness within my chest.
Something was wrong that I couldn't see.
God!!!!, I didn't know that he had left.

Two days after his death.....
I held his cold and lifeless hand.
There were just so very many things
That I could not fully understand.

Two weeks after his death.....
That sparkle stolen from my eyes,
No longer to see his beautiful smile.
I never, ever thought that he would die.

Two months after his death.....
There was so much I needed to learn.
I was confused when he went away,
And I still waited for his return.

Two years after his death.....
I still wish that he could be mine,
To talk and laugh and go for walks.
I miss those special moments in time.

Two minutes after MY death......
Once again I will hear him scream,
"Hey Mom, it's me, I'm over here,
And Mom, this time it's not a dream"

Two hours after MY death.....
I'll hold him close again to my chest.
He'll look at me and say... "Now see?",
It doesn't seem so long since I left."

Two days after MY death.....
He will gently take me by the hand,
And show me all the glorious things,
And help me to understand.

Two weeks after MY death.....
I'll see that sparkle in his eyes.
Once again he'll warm me with his smile,
And say... "You see, Mom, I didn't die".

Two months after MY death.....
Together we'll have so much to learn.
We'll never have to go away,
Or long for each other's return."

Two years after MY death.....
Once again he will finally be mine.
We'll talk and laugh and go for long walks,
Because, we'll have nothing......but time.

by Christine Ross,
in Memory of
Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001

i'm missing you terribly this morning, joe. i love you!

mom

—mom
Wednesday, January 19, 2005

today is your baby sister's birthday joe.......are you taking good care of our little danielle? i can close my eyes and picture the two of you.....her tiny little hand in yours and you looking down at her smiling.
give my baby girl a kiss from her mommy...and tell her to give you one from me too!
i love you son!
mom

—mom
Tuesday, January 11, 2005

i'm just feeling heartsore and infinitely weary today. i miss you more than i have words for.
i love you (forever and a day)
mom

—jayedee
Wednesday, January 05, 2005

i simply cannot comprehend the fact that i will never see you, in this life, again. never see you smile, never hear you laugh, never smell the smell that was you. i miss you jordin.....so very much.
i love you! (forever and a day)
mom

—mom
Tuesday, January 04, 2005

What touches us
Is the joy
They brought us
What comforts us
Are the memories
We Share
What lasts........
Is love.
Author Unknown
Jayedee, a pos mom sent this poem to me and I wanted to share with you and Jordin.
rebecca Jenny's mom

—Rebecca Baker, Akron, Ohio
Tuesday, January 04, 2005

I really miss you bro. Today every song on the radio made me think of you. I can't imagine missing you like this for the rest of my life, it's not fair you sould be here. I love you always. C-ya then. XOXO Connie

—Connie, Orlando, Florida
Monday, January 03, 2005

My deepest prayers and thoughts are with you Lib my dear friend and also with your family and your mom too Jayedee see I havent forgotten your name. see

—Karen Taylor, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Monday, January 03, 2005

I dont know where to begin...I miss you more and more.Every thought i have turns into thinking about you.Evey thought.you will always be with me.I feel like you took a partof me of away when you went away that i can never get back.I love you Jordin.

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Sunday, January 02, 2005

Joe,
One month. I cannot believe it has been one month. All I know is I don't want to have to do this without you. And I hope that somewhere deep inside you knew, really knew how very much I love you and how much you meant to me, Chad and the kids. I am so grateful for having gotten to know you Jordin. I thank you for that. And I love and miss you always.
Your big sis, Lib

—Lib, Longwood, Florida
Thursday, December 30, 2004

—Anonymous
Thursday, December 30, 2004

oh joe...tomorrow is new years eve and i cannot begin to imagine a year without you in it. if it's in your power, please help me to stop feeling that i'm leaving you behind somehow. i love you joe!
mom

—mom, geneva, Florida
Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Jordin, I'm trying to accept that you are where you need to be so that you may understand your purpose and see the beauty you possess, and that I will be with you again. That this is a short part of a great journey that we are taking together and that I will see you again. But I miss you now bro. Until then.
XOXO

—Connie, Orlando, Florida
Sunday, December 19, 2004

jordin, you are deeply loved and greatly missed. only the thought of seeing you again one day gets me through. i love you!!!
your sis patty

—patty stevens, orlando, Florida
Thursday, December 16, 2004

Our love, thoughts and prayers are with you all. May God bring you peace and comfort during this most difficult time. We love you and are here if you need us.
(((Hugs)))

—Larry, Dolly & Tyler, Kannapolis, North Carolina
Thursday, December 16, 2004

jayedee...there are no words to express to you and your family the sorrow i feel at your loss. but rest assured that your beautiful son is indeed *in the arms of an angel* (sarah mclachlan) love & hugs

—stacey, McLean, Virginia
Wednesday, December 15, 2004

To my dearest Jordin,You are dearly missed and forever loved.There will never be anyone like you ever.I love you so very much and can't wait to be with you again.Your sister,Bri

—Brianna, Geneva, Florida
Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Danny Sr. and family, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. May God be with you and your family during this time. You all are in my prayers.

Debbie (Handy Way)

—Debbie Siehl, Chuluota, Florida
Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Jayedee, There is no way to find the words to comfort. Just as there is no way someone else could understand how we feel about our children. I do know that your loss is heavens gain. Your family is the last one we pray for everynight before Kaitlyn goes to bed. You will all always be in our thoughts. Sorry for your loss...

—Stephen
Tuesday, December 14, 2004

God Bless each of you for your love, support and prayers, it means so very much to our family.

Jordin, baby boy, I miss you so much and pray that you have the answers now that you did not have in life. The longer I sit here the fewer words that come to mind, but a song plays on my heart and I am led to share........

AMY GRANT lyrics - "In A Little While"



(Amy Grant, Gary Chapman, Brown Bannister, Shane Keister)

Got a ticket coming home
Wish the officer had known
What a day today has been
Then I stumbled through the door
Dropping junk mail on the floor
When will this day end
But then your letter caught my eye
Brought the hope in me to life
Cause you know me very well
And I bet you wrote me just to tell me

[Chorus:]
In a little while
We'll be with the Father
Can't you see Him smile
In a little while
We'll be home forever
In a while
we're just here
To learn to love Him
We'll be home
In just a little while

Boy, that letter hit the spot
Made me think of all I've got
And all that waits for me
Guess I've known it all day long

Wonder where my thoughts went wrong
When will my heart believe
Wakin' half-way through the night
Reachin' toward the lamp for light
Pickin' up the Word I find
Here's another letter to remind me

[Chorus]

Days like these are just a test of our will
Will we walk or will we fall?

Well, I can almost see the top of the hill
And I believe it's worth it all

I love you Jordin and cannot wait to hug you again!

—Lib, Longwood, Florida
Monday, December 13, 2004


Monday, December 13, 2004

Oh Jayedee I'm so sorry to hear about ur loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and ur family. {{{{{BigHugz}}}}} Your Jordin is ur special angel now!!! Luv you!!!

—Cindy, Maryland
Sunday, December 12, 2004

A Child Loaned

"I'll lend you for a little time,
A child of mine," He said,
"For you to love the while he lives,
And mourn when he is dead.
It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three,
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care of him for me?
He'll bring his charm to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief,
You'll have his lovely memories,
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there,
I want this child to learn.
I've looked the whole world over,
In search for teacher's true,
And from the throngs that crown life's lanes,
I have selected you."

"Now will you give him all your love,
Nor think the labour vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call,
To take him back again?"
I fancied that I heard them say,
"Dear Lord,
Thy will be done.
For all the joy Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may.
And for the happiness we've known,
Will ever grateful stay.
But should Your angels call for him,
Much sooner than we planned.
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes,
And try to understand."

oh baby, i miss you so much!

i love you

ps.....did you have anything to do with those windchimes this morning?

—mom
Sunday, December 12, 2004

Jayedee, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm sure its been unbearable to deal with but I'm also sure you have the strenght to pick up the pieces. Take Care & Be Safe, Love Claire

—Claire, Stafford, Virginia
Friday, December 10, 2004

Jayedee and family, you all have my sincere condolences. May God be with you as you handle everything. Jaydee my heart is heavy for you my dear. Just remember all of you to be together and help each get through all. Your sister in Christ SAM

—Shirley A Mattley, Melbourne, Florida
Friday, December 10, 2004

Jay Dee, please accept my deepest sympathy for your loss. I pray that you can rejoice that he is with the Lord. He shares my birthday, also :) What a special blessing.

—Kate Warren, Nazareth, Pennsylvania
Friday, December 10, 2004

You are all in my prayers.
My deepest sympathy,
Annie

—Ann Durand, Kissimmee, Florida
Friday, December 10, 2004